Desperate Measures - Part 1

How am I doing?

You’re doing great. Just roll up your sleeves and deliver your punch lines. The country is just waiting to be taken by storm. Don’t forget to read out the lines that Didi added this morning.

How did I do?

You were simply brilliant. Tharoor says this was the best speech in the country after ‘Tryst with destiny’. That mummy coming in and crying and that poison stuff was absolutely thrilling. Jairam and Mani have called it the “Obama moment” and we have assembled the media who will parrot it. Just see what they had to say.

That ‘poison’ speech by Rahul Gandhi at his coronation as Vice-President of the party on January 20, 2013 was supposedly the peak. If that was his peak, it could only go downhill.

It’s easy to say “power is poison” when you are born into it with a silver spoon. Then there was a flurry of speeches at CII and more hapless ‘victims’ of his speeches. The nation was not only stunned but laughed like never before. India is a river, India is a beehive, India is a computer. There was this “I lost it” moment. Rahul Gandhi was just warming up. The hits just kept on coming. It shifted from Kalawati to Girish the carpenter. Jupiter’s escape velocity, a “complete nonsense” that should be torn and thrown away, people doing yoga and dancing in New York, Bachchan pics in Spain, poverty is a state of mind, you can’t eat airports and roads. The latest was 25000 mosquitoes! And then Dr.Rahul Gandhi wonders “Indian media focuses too much on the noise. I read the morning papers and think to myself why are they writing this stuff”. Poor chap, doesn’t realise that half that noise is about him and his profound statements.

The sycophants in the party, the MSM and assorted clowns on the social media couldn’t stop doing their Wah-Wahs at the moronic utterances of the man. The more RG blundered the more they applauded him. People like Ajay Maken applauded him even when they were publicly humiliated for no reason. Newly appointed sidekicks like Sanjay Jha applauded him even before RG could complete his blunders. Remind of you anyone? Remember that drunkard who was a total moron when it came to poetry? He thought he was a great Shayar and his sycophants couldn’t stop applauding his moronery. Take a look (2.54 mins):

So it takes a venerable man to tell the guy his poetry is dumb and stupid. His advice? Get a woman in your life! So I suppose someone similar in RG’s camp finally told him to get some “Wazan” in his speeches and talk about women in his speeches. Umm… I guess if I were to imagine these venerable people; they would be like Kumar Ketkar, Barkha, Rajdeep or Vinod Mehta or people similar to them. After all, Congress did decide to hire journalists friendly to their camp to help their campaigns.  

So once the “Munshiji” told RahulG the secret to speeches, the latter has been talking about his Mother, his Daadi, his Great Grandfather and his Daddy. He talks more and more about the “sacrifices” they made for this country. To that he adds a danger concoction; one is that of the communal party inflaming riots and Muslim youth who are victims are being lured by ISI of Pakistan. After all the song and dance about development and progress the realisation has dawned upon Congress that they really do not have anything to talk about. The NREGAs, the FSBs, the RTIs, the RTEs have failed to generate a connection with people at the rallies. Even if all of those programs in their entirety may not be bad, their delivery has certainly been corrupt and faulty. They have nothing to defend the deep-rooted corruption that the party is a fountainhead of. The only two options left are “fear-mongering” and “emotional victimhood”. The proportion this fear mongering is taking is far too serious to ignore. It has already resulted in certain incidents that are dangerous signals.

When Rajiv Gandhi was assassinated in 1991 the country was shown a younger RahulG who was calm and took the pain of his father’s death in public quite maturely. The images of RG from RajivG’s funeral were of a person who appeared to be bearing his grief privately and not publicly. Times have changed since then. RahulG neither appears to be calm or sensible. He also seems to lack the maturity to carry people with him. His silly utterances can be glossed over but the sudden change in his discourse is certainly not entirely his own.

It should be noted that while this dialogue is being brought forth by RahulG he may not be the brain behind it. Consequently, the ministers and spokies of the Congress have raked up the most useless issues to occupy the media. Mundane nonsense like what Narendra Modi said or didn’t say. Mindless rubbish about the legacy of Sardar Patel or whether Alexander The Moron landed near Ganga or not. The Hindu proactively propped up an issue of Sardar Patel banning RSS and removing the ban with some undertaking of the organisation remaining non-political. This was a “wag the dog” story to distract. How spurious the timing is should be measured by the fact that the RSS ban was before the Constitution and before the first ever elections. Having adopted a Constitution, all the arguments with relation to the ban on RSS become irrelevant simply because nobody or no entity can be stopped from legally participating in politics as long as it’s within the law.

This plant by The Hindu was then backed by some protests by people supposedly from the RSS. Then on October 31 Ajay Maken screamed about the journo behind the article complaining to the Congress which was later denied by her. The earliest hint of this whole scam was when Jairam Ramesh hinted in a TV interview that the election battle was between Congress and RSS. These are desperate times for the Congress. Desperate times call for desperate measures and that is exactly what the party and some of its allies have undertaken. It’s a new warning of the chaos that the country is going to be plunged into. In this series we shall see how these desperate measures are being rolled out. 

Happy Diwali!